Dating a military officer
So I may not have been competing for one guy with 24 other girls living in one house for a few months, but I did have to wait forever to get that coveted one on one time with the Captain while we were dating.His first wife, the Army, kept him incredibly busy, and the distance between us didn’t help either.This list is not simply a composition of pros or cons, but rather an overview of what dating a service member active duty or veteran — is like. They are meant to be extremely close with this group of people and everyone else is simply on a need-to-know basis. It is not a competition between his military friends and you; they are people who shared a very intimate part of his life, and you should want to be close with them, too. He will love you fiercely and be the most faithful companion, if you can promise the same. Granted, that is earned due to the nature of their work and how much they put on the line.As the significant other, you will not get more details than necessary on anything unless you poke and prod. Related: The unconventional relationship is the norm in the military. However, in the civilian world, or in a relationship, it may be a little hard to deal with. Especially if he is coming from a higher rank, it may be increasingly difficult for him to “fall in line” with civilian life. Not every soldier comes home with post-traumatic stress.
Just keep in mind that the chances of him wanting to open up and talk about it — let alone seek help — are slim to none, at least at first.
I still remember on my first trip when I found his “cheat sheet” that he had created on an index card, complete with times the monorail would depart in Seattle, when the underground tour began, and different landmarks along the way to point out.
I still have that index card saved in a box of memories I keep from my time with the Captain. Other amazing trips included a getaway to Boston for the Nutcracker at Christmas time, my first-ever trip to a Tiffany & Co, showing me how to shoot a gun, and teaching me how to snowboard with endless patience and kisses.
There have been a few articles about the pros and cons of dating the Generation Y military man, and while some of them are better reads than others, I felt the need to weigh in. Military men may never have closer relationships than those they made in the military.
This is based solely on the experiences of my veteran friends, as well as my own with a past paramour. The military teaches service members to trust their unit, and few others. If he comes to you with a problem, chances are he’ll talk about it until he no longer wants to and then go into lockdown. That is not a good thing or a bad thing, that is just a matter of fact and something you need to understand. Military men are used to their band of brothers, and are bred to be loyal and protective. Some branches of the military (I’m looking at you, Marines) have a feeling of superiority over others.